Broke, Busted, Yet Trusting

By: Khalilah Shelton

Sometimes life sucks.  There are things that happen that are totally out of our control.  No one chooses to lose a parent to cancer, nobody signs up to have their child continuously in the hospital.  I certainly did not plan to have my children and my mother in a house fire. I did not petition for the heartbreak of not knowing if my 6 year old's lungs would recover from the smoke inhalation or the stress and anxiety of seeing my baby girl's second degree burns slowly healing.  Sometimes life has a way of leaving us broke, busted and disgusted. When tragedy strikes it can leave us in a whirlwind of emotions, questions, and wrestlings. I wondered why fire crept in at night rather than the day. Was it seeking to steal, kill and destroy? Or had it been assigned with refining our lives and focusing our worship on the Savior? Why us? Why now?  How do I respond? Lord, what do You expect of me? 

Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God; for it is pleasant, and a song of praise is fitting. The Lord builds up Jerusalem; he gathers the outcasts of Israel. He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of the stars; he gives to all of them their names. Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure. The Lord lifts up the humble; he casts the wicked to the ground.

Psalms 147:1‭-‬6 ESV

God commands praise because He is always worthy, "a song of praise is fitting."  He created us for His own glory. Our various situations do not nullify His command or His glory.  Praising the Lord is good and beautiful and it is fitting as he is a good and beautiful God!! He alone is worthy of our praise, even before he does anything in the earth or on our behalf.

In the midst of our trials it can be hard to see God. For me, it was hard to know that God saw me.  I was doing all that I knew to do, but there have been moments (long moments) when I wondered if God saw me.  However, the scripture reassured me that He did! And He sees you too! God gathers his people to himself. He made a nation for himself and extended that to include me, one who does not qualify for God's family except to be invited by God himself and brought in through His blood and righteousness.  The outcasts, not just Gentiles, but the outcasts, societies misfits, broken and rejected. God sees us and welcomes us in! 

"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds."

He not only brings in us misfit, broken people but he heals us.  He binds up our wounds which indicates that he knows each of them and comes near enough to do something about them.  He recognizes my brokenness and heals my wounds!!!! 

There is nothing God cannot do.  He is huge. He is powerful. He is intelligent because he knows how many stars are required for his glory and for his plan to work perfectly.  He is precise. He gives them all their names. He works in great detail and with much attention. Who loves like this?! Like really, who can know and care this much. None other has the capacity! Praise Your name, Lord!!!!

Jesus too knows what it is to be broke, busted and disgusted.  He too knows what it's like to feel like God is not near when He was on the cross.  He lived a life acquainted with pain, brokenness and the anguish of living in a sinful world.  He not only sits in our pain with us but has patched a road to righteousness with his blood, sweat and tears on our behalf.  Broken, busted and disgusted is not our final destination!

If I'm honest with how I feel about my trials, I must also be honest about my God. If God can understand stars, number them, name them. If God can know man and number us and name us, and if He can do all of these things, why should I not trust Him?  Why would I not worship Him? How could I think that He has no regard for me when He said that making everything else was good but making man in His image, was very good? I believe You, God. That You are great and abundant in power. You are near to my broken heart and are binding up and healing my wounds. Praise is fitting for a King.  May our lips and hearts and minds follow what is true, not just what they feel. I will praise the Lord. Let everything that has breath praise the Lord! Sister, even when you're broken and busted, you can still trust God!